Tools for releasing holiday stress and woes of the season in this article from Joseph Drumheller.
Oh no, the holidays are coming. Getting together with my family…ugh!
Questions: What is wrong with my family? Why do they drive me absolutely nuts every holiday season?!? Or maybe, on the other hand, what’s wrong with me?
Answer: There is nothing wrong with any of you. You are all perfect expressions of who you are at this point in time. However, there is always room for growth.
Nothing better illustrates how the subconscious mind works than family difficulties during the holidays. It’s the time of year for the subconscious mind to shine.
Almost everything that happens in your day-to-day existence is an outward expression of what is stored in your subconscious. Whatever lives within you will be reflected back to you in the events of your life—the good, the bad and everything in between. If you have feelings of conflict, anger, unworthiness or sadness living inside you, it will show up in the interaction of your relationships. This happens most readily in our immediate families. It’s especially obvious when it’s a repeating pattern during the holidays.
The best way to heal suppressed emotion causing family conflict is to recognize that relationship difficulties begin inside of you. If you blame your problems on your spouse, parents, children, aunts, uncles, cousins, the government, the economy, or whatever, you’re looking in the wrong place. Your suffering is never about someone or something else outside of you. It’s always about what’s going on inside of you.
The next thing to do is release the emotion trapped inside. This will begin the process of ending charged emotional situations that come up during the holidays. Meditation is the perfect tool. It’s relaxing, non-invasive and extremely effective at alleviating the woes seemingly caused by someone else, like your family.
First, imagine a family member who grates your nerves. Then, feel the emotional response it produces in your body (i.e. tightens in your stomach, anger in your heart, anxiety in your head, etc.). Then, sit and relax in deep quiet. Next, gently focus your attention on that spot and ask your higher power to help remove the discomfort.
In a few moments the emotion should start to move. It may swirl around, pulse or vibrate. Keep your focus on it until it dissolves or moves away from your body. Stay with it until it’s completely gone. That’s all there is to it. If you continue to practice, the effects will be more and more apparent.
The next step is to check the results. Get together with your family over the holidays. See if you notice any difference. Maybe Aunt Bessie won’t be so annoying. Or maybe your brother will stop bringing up embarrassing childhood memories. Or maybe the little digs your Mom is famous for won’t bother you any more.
Whatever positive shift you notice, recognize it as a result of your own inner work. You helped heal your family by doing nothing more than healing yourself. And if that is all you get this upcoming holiday season, it may be your best one ever.
Wishing you and your family a very happy holiday season!