Buddha said, “True love is born from understanding”
Cultivating love for ourselves requires understanding and appreciation of what makes us tick.
Exploring what you truly like, love and enjoy grows your appreciation. I’m going to repeat this part: what YOU like, love and enjoy. It’s absolutely powerful and loving to ask yourself, “What makes my heart sing?” Can you imagine asking yourself this each and every day? Now imagine asking what makes your heart sing many times throughout each day.
I’m always amazed at the wisdom of my clients’ hearts. You may worry that if you followed your heart you wouldn’t do anything productive, make money or finish any sort of study. What I’ve noticed first is that clients are SO relieved to be asked what makes their heart sing. Relief is one of Spirit’s indicators. It’s the turning point emotion. Seriously, relief always feels pleasant, like taking off a pair of high heels after a long evening. Relief points us in the direction of better and better feeling emotions like hope and excitement, which is a great jumping-off place for being productive, making money, and finishing any sort of project.
Secondly, I notice that finding out what makes someone’s heart sing pushes all of their ‘shoulds’ to the surface for examination. One of my model mentoring clients, Jo (22 years old), signed a contract with a prestigious modeling agency in New York City. This was after a fashion photographer had scouted her. The photographer introduced her to an agent with 25 years experience and the two of them prepared her for New York. They helped her create her portfolio and make appointments with modeling agencies. All the preparation (her weekly sessions with me included) paid off, and she moved to NYC to try her hand at the biggest modeling market in the world.
Jo booked a few jobs and tried her best to communicate plainly with her agency there. Communicating with her agency was a struggle for her. She had to gear herself up to have talks with them about how they were handling her career. Although she felt she conveyed herself well, she never genuinely felt like the people at her agency “got” her. After four months, it was necessary for her to make a decision of whether or not to stay in NYC or move to LA to be with her long-time boyfriend and enter the fashion world there. She was lamenting about how tough the decision was during one of our sessions. When I asked her what made her heart sing, she was a little surprised and at the same time glad that that’s where I was taking her session.
Her whole demeanor changed; her face relaxed, her shoulders dropped and she breathed a bit deeper. She told me that she loved the weather in California. She also loved the farmers’ markets, outdoor lifestyle, and community of friends she was connected to there. “BUT” (here come the ‘shoulds’), she said, “I don’t want to let down the people who helped me get to New York. I’ve put so much time into this agency and have just started making modeling connections here. I shouldn’t just leave now after all this just because I dread freezing this coming winter and being away from my boyfriend. Maybe I should just suck it up and stay.”
I asked her how she felt when she thought of living in LA. She said she felt relieved, kind of happy and excited. I asked how she felt when she thought about staying in NYC. She said her energy just drops every time she thinks of it. Jo moved to LA, is thrilled to be able to relax at the beach on her days off and to cherish the outdoor lifestyle she and her boyfriend share. Here’s where her ‘heart’s wisdom’ came into play. The very first modeling agency she met with in LA took her immediately. She felt instantly at home, like they “got” her, and she is making a better living after only a couple short months. What made her heart sing also led her to more money and a better lifestyle.
We bring about appreciation and love for ourselves by finding out what makes our heart sing and doing it.
Much love, Susan