What Do You Choose to Believe?
We hear so much about freedom of choice, yet how often do you stop to think about it and what it means? Seemingly, most people correlate the idea of choice mainly to material things like the vehicle they buy, the way they wear their hair, their clothing, their job, or where they live. But doesn’t it go far deeper than that?
What about choosing how you feel?
How many times do you hear someone say that another person made them angry? Or someone hurt their feelings? How many times have you said something like that? Although it may feel true at that moment, it really isn’t. No one can make you feel anything. In the end, it is up to you how you feel. Ultimately, you choose how you react or respond to any situation.
You may balk at the idea, but before you choose to get upset over it, let me explain further. Choosing how you feel is an extension of our free will. Each of us create our emotions based on how we perceive things. In other words, what we believe. Things happen, we form beliefs about ourselves and life based on those experiences, then those beliefs spur our emotions and drive our behavior.
If a person believes that they are stupid, then when someone says they are or even hints that they are being stupid, the person usually gets quite upset. Yet getting upset is a choice. One could choose instead to ignore what the other person said, or better yet, simply take it as an opinion. Someone thinking you are stupid does not make you stupid, nor does it mean that you need to get upset over it. After all, the truth needs no defense.
In other words, when you know (believe) you are smart, then another person saying that you are stupid no longer upsets you. It could only upset you if you chose to be upset. Yet, believing you are stupid, even just a little bit, you are most likely to choose to be offended. Hearing you are stupid scratches at a hidden belief that you are stupid, which makes you uncomfortable or outright angry and may lead to you lashing out.
The empowering part is that you could choose to look at your upset and see it as an opportunity to clear any false or hidden beliefs you have about being stupid. Take a deeper look at your feelings and the false beliefs about yourself the situation stirred up. Does a part of you think you are stupid? Maybe just within a certain parameter. You may feel stupid when it comes to math, yet you are a genius at carpentry. Have you been denying that part of you that feels stupid?
Once a false or hidden belief is uncovered you have the opportunity to shift it or release it entirely. In the end, it is a matter of choice. You may choose to shift it or you may choose not to if you feel it is still serving you in a positive manner. Just know in the end, if you choose to keep it, you will likely still be offended and that is your choice.